Update 40: Battle Network Ladette.EXE



Okay, but what if I did it very lightly?
That still wouldn't work. You can't just beat someone's back with a blunt object to make it feel better.
But my sheaths are super blunt and not sharp! Why wouldn't that be good for getting kricks outta someone's back?
Because spines and muscle do not work that way.
Hey, uh, not to bother you two, but my back's still really screwed up...
Gimme a minute, Vince, I'll be ready as soon as I'm done talking.
I am oath-bound to keep you from "fixing" Vince's back by beating it with your sheath.
Is what I'm suggesting really that dangerous?
Agh...



...I just realized something.
What?
This lizard's carapace...



Is entirely made out of bone...
...'Kay, that's actually kinda hardcore.

Bone Lizard

HP: 16280STR: 61TEC: 45VIT: 35AGI: 45LUC: 42
EXP Given: 42000

Damage Vulnerabilities:
150% 150% 150%
150% 150% 50%

Disable Vulnerabilities:
50% 50% 50% 10% 50% 10% 10%
10% 10% 30%
30% 30% 50%
  • Devour: Deals overkill cut damage to all party members. Slow.
  • Evil Eye: Attempts to inflict curse on one party member, with a basically guaranteed chance. Very fast.
  • Devour: Deals 160% melee STR-based cut damage to all party members. The damage ranges from 470 to 566 on average. Has a 70% speed modifier and a base accuracy of 99%.
  • Evil Eye: Attempts to inflict curse on one party member, with a 90% base chance. The effective chance ranges from 102% to 134% on average. Has a 150% speed modifier.
  • Bone Lizards always open with Evil Eye.
  • If no party members are cursed, and the Bone Lizard has randomly decided it can use Evil Eye again, it will cast Evil Eye.
  • Devour becomes considerably more likely when the Bone Lizard is at 50% HP or lower.
  • If this is the first turn, cast Evil Eye, and set the Evil Eye flag.
  • If the Evil Eye flag is not set, and no party members are afflicted with curse, 49% chance to use Evil Eye, targeting party members without curse, and set the Evil Eye flag.
  • 49% chance to unset the Evil Eye flag.
  • If the Bone Lizard's HP is at 100% to 51%:
    • 34% chance to use Devour.
    • 66% chance to Attack.
  • If the Bone Lizard's HP is at 50% or below:
    • 74% chance to use Devour.
    • 36% chance to Attack.
  • Evil Eye: Attempts to inflict curse on one enemy. Fast.
  • Evil Eye: Attempts to inflict curse on one enemy. Has a 120% speed modifier at all levels.
Drops:
  • Normal: Sternum. 100% chance. Sells for 3000 en.
    • Dino Plate (+66 DEF, +10% cut/stab/bash resistance): Made from 1 Sternum. Costs 17600 en.
  • Rare: Dragon Tail. 40% chance. Sells for 3800 en.
    • Dragonbone Staff (+143 ATK, +60 HP, +5 TEC): Made from 1 Dragon Tail. Costs 22000 en.
  • Conditional: Torn Heart (Kill while poisoned). 80% chance. Sells for 9000 en.
    • Ruby Gage (+39 DEF, +3 TEC, +5 AGI; Ronin only): Made from 1 Torn Heart. Costs 37000 en.
Head binds completely shut Bone Lizards down, which is good, because Devour will kill most, if not all, of my party.
The FOEs that take a lot of damage are always really fun. At least, they're fun if they don't have 160% melee cut damage to your entire party with 61 STR. But seeing big numbers is fun.

Hah!
You've become quite skilled with whips as of late.
Eheheh... Yeah, I sort of...just spent a while meditating on the image of myself using whips, and...got comfortable with it.
'Ey, personal progress. Keep it up, Sig.
...
What? I'm capable'a bein' genuine.


Too! Bad!


Rushing Hellfire!


I'm on a roll, I guess.


For a creature whose carapace is made out of bone, I expected it to be hardier.
Clear Strike's animation is great. It's so cute.

I love it when Recharge activates when I have Elderevenge.
Meanwhile Ecstasy's is weird. It doesn't look like a whip skill. It feels more like a re-shaded Swift Edge with a rose underimposed.
That's because it is.

Chump.



Ooh, got the rare drop. I'll come back later and get that conditional so I can get Momoe's secondary ultimate equipment.


Dragonbone Staff (+143 ATK, +60 HP, +5 TEC) is made from 1 Dragon Tail (Bone Lizard rare). Costs 22000 en.

Dino Plate (+66 DEF, +10% cut/stab/bash resistance) is made from 1 Sternum (Bone Lizard normal). Costs 17600 en.
The Dragonbone Staff is really, really good for Combat Medics. The Dino Plate's also good for characters who can equip light armor, since +10% physical resistance, as I've said before, goes a lot farther than any amount of DEF.

I grab a Dragonbone Staff for Thierry.


There we go!


Ruby Gage (+39 DEF, +3 TEC, +5 AGI; Ronin only) is made from 1 Torn Heart (Bone Lizard conditional). Costs 37000 en.
And now that I've got it, time to never use it.

Seriously this thing is not worth it. Ronin do not need TEC and they definitely don't need AGI. I'd rather just have either a Shoulder Shield or a Moss Band in its place. I guess I'll use it until I can get Moss Bands all the way down on B30F, but ugh.
I think this thing may be intended for Ronin who use the Swift Drawing Stance. AGI helps with additional evasion, as well as to go first with Beheading Cut, whereas TEC enhances Beheading Cut. It might also work for Clear Stance, giving AGI to go faster with and TEC to be more likely to proc Arm Strike. But the game's balance is such that those two stances are unattractive unless you're really committed to the coolness factor, so...

After this, I went on a massive cleanup spree and fought a bunch of FOEs I hadn't yet, and got drops I was missing. All of this was severely below my level, so I didn't bother showing it here.
Vorpal (+46 ATK, +20 HP, +3 AGI) is made from 1 Tied Scythe (Reaping Shade conditional). Costs 1800 en.

Bardiche (+90 ATK, +20 HP) is made from 1 Black Carapace (Blood Ant normal). Costs 6720 en.

Ochiba (+113 ATK) is made from 1 Red Blade (Aquatic Butcher normal). Costs 10300 en.

Speed Boot (+37 DEF, +30 TP, +5 AGI; Survivalist only) is made from 1 Dread Crest (Forest Demon conditional). Costs 40000 en.

Al Tarf Shield (+27 DEF, +1 TEC, +3 AGI) is made from 1 Volt Shell (Aquatic Butcher conditional). Costs 2730 en.

Hide Cape (+60 HP, +30% stab resistance) is made from 1 Gator Skin (Creeping Death normal). Costs 1500 en.
There's better things you could put on a Survivalist than a Speed Boot.
There's worse things, too. If you're really committed to Trick Step and Chain Dance despite their relative ineffectiveness, extra AGI can't hurt. It's just that I'm sure there's much better pieces of equipment to get extra AGI from.

Meteor Axe (+240 ATK, +50 HP, +5 VIT) is made from 1 Statue Arm (Golem conditional). Costs 260000 en.
Now this is the shit. Second highest ATK of any weapon in the game, accompanied by a massive survivability bonus. Judith will be using this whenever she uses axes from now on.

Paralysis Ankh (Immunity to paralysis) is made from 1 Paralyzed Tail (Flamerat conditional). Costs 4500 en.

Unihorn (Purges all debuffs from all party members) is made from 1 Tree Eye (Medusa Tree rare). Costs 1100 en.

Hunting Horn (Chance for user to generate a Grimoire) is made from 1 Poison Pith (Medusa Tree conditional). Costs 2500 en.

Sage Wand (+170 ATK, +200 TP, +8 TEC) is made from 1 Beast Eye (Manticore conditional). Costs 131000 en.
Yes. Best staff. For everyone. Yes, even Combat Medics. It has 6 less ATK than the "ultimate" Combat Medic staff, but it has 3 more TEC, and 200 TP instead of 80 HP. I need it.

Katya gets the first one. I'll go get Thierry one later.
Ahahahaha, 200TP. Yeah, uh, TP was already not a problem, but in the postgame Etrian Odyssey games tend to throw any notion of TP economy right out the window.

Faerie Mail (+90 DEF, +30 TP, +5 AGI; Troubadour only) is made from 1 Velvet (Alraune conditional). Costs 77000 en.
Ehhhhhhh? The TP is nice, I guess? Troubadours don't really need stats.

Also, I cheated, and gave myself a Glacier Ootheca. Fuck getting that thing legitimately.
what the fuck is an ootheca anyway





Good work, everyone. Was that a tough quest?
Eh.
You really are turning out to be one of the top guilds, you know? Well, here's the reward.






Oh, right, this thing exists too.



It's ludicrously easy to get a preemptive on Wyvern.

Wyvern

HP: 22500STR: 80TEC: 58VIT: 55AGI: 55LUC: 49
EXP Given: 250000

Damage Vulnerabilities:
100% 100% 100%
50% 125% 0%

Disable Vulnerabilities:
30% 50% 50% 30% 50% 50% 30%
0.1% 0.1% 20%
50% 30% 30%
  • Wing Talon: Deals overkill cut damage to one party member. Very fast.
  • Tail Strike: Deals overkill stab damage to one party member, with splash damage. Slow.
  • Whirlwind: Attempts to bind the legs of all party members, with an all-but-guaranteed chance. Average speed.
  • Burning Ray: Deals overkill volt damage to one party member. Very slow.
  • Wing Talon: Deals 150% melee STR-based cut damage to one party member. The damage ranges from 702 to 853 on average. Has a 150% speed modifier and a base accuracy of 99%.
  • Tail Strike: Deals 180% melee STR-based stab damage to one party member. The damage ranges from 842 to 1024 on average. Deals splash damage to adjacent targets. Has a 70% speed modifier and a base accuracy of 99%.
  • Whirlwind: Attempts to bind the legs of all party members, with an 80% base chance. The effective chance ranges from 102% to 134% on average. Has no speed modifier.
  • Burning Ray: Deals 450% ranged TEC-based volt damage to one party member. The damage ranges from 677 to 935 on average. Has a 50% speed modifier and a base accuracy of 150%.
  • Wyvern always opens with Burning Ray.
  • Wyvern always uses Whirlwind on turns that are multiples of 5 when it's not at extremely low HP.
  • Wyvern is slightly less likely to use Wing Talon at low HP.
  • Wyvern can target the party member with the lowest current HP with Wing Talon when it's at high HP.
  • If this is the first turn, use Burning Ray.
  • If the current turn is a multiple of 5, and Wyvern is above 10% HP, use Whirlwind.
  • If Wyvern's HP is at 50% or lower:
    • 29% chance to use Wing Talon.
    • Else, 30% chance to use Tail Strike.
    • Else, use Burning Ray.
  • If Wyvern's HP is at 100% to 51%:
    • 39% chance to use Wing Talon.
      • 50% chance to target the party member with the lowest HP.
      • Else, use standard targeting.
    • Else, 30% chance to use Tail Strike.
    • Else, use Burning Ray.
  • Wing Talon: Deals cut damage to one enemy. Very fast.
  • Tail Strike: Deals stab damage to one enemy. Deals splash damage to adjacent targets. Slow.
  • Burning Ray: Deals volt damage to one enemy. Very slow.
  • Wing Talon: Deals melee STR-based cut damage to one enemy. Has a 150% speed modifier and a base accuracy of 99% at all levels.
  • Tail Strike: Deals melee STR-based stab damage to one enemy. Deals splash damage to adjacent targets. Has a 70% speed modifier and a base accuracy of 99% at all levels.
  • Burning Ray: Deals ranged TEC-based volt damage to one enemy. Has a 50% speed modifier and a base accuracy of 150% at all levels.
Drops:
  • Normal: Tough Wing. 100% chance. Sells for 12500 en.
    • Wyvernmail (+70 DEF, +5% damage/ailment/bind resistance): Made from 1 Tough Wing. Costs 100000 en.
  • Conditional: Restrained Legs (Kill while legs are bound). 100% chance. Sells for 37500 en.
    • Wyvern Spear (+218 ATK, +40 HP, +40 TP; Highlander only): Made from 1 Restrained Legs. Costs 220000 en.
Bring some way to nullify Wyvern's damage, or disable it, or you'll be sorry!
For some reason, I remember this thing being a pushover. I'm not sure why. Burning Ray will mess you up but the rest can be mitigated for the most part.
Alraune wasn't quite "disable or die". Wyvern is, and that's where that trend starts in this game.

...I'm not sure why it insists on binding your legs, though. Middle finger for Chain Dance? Except Burning Ray already has 150% accuracy...

Standard prep.

Except for Vince. I don't know why I had him do that.

Shut up.


Hold still, as well.


Well, that sucked.
No argument here.


This isn't gonna really help much, with how much physical damage Wyvern deals, but it's better than nothing.

Might as well try to disable Wing Talon and Whirlwind.

CPR is your best friend when it comes to dealing with kill moves.

...I underestimated how hard it is to restrain gigantic wings.
Yeah, it seems. A bit hard?


An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.


Absolute Zero!


Look at those TP restore numbers on Katya. I love it.

My point...exactly...
I love CPR.

Great duration on the paralysis, there.

Bang bang bang.


No wonder we didn't fight this thing back then...
I love CPR.

Agreed...
I didn't reapply CPR on Thierry, because that would've been expensive. Oh well.

At least Wolf Pack persisted, even though he's dead.

There we go.


Phew.

Hurry doc get up please.


I'm safe from Whirlwind this turn.

I'm still amazed that tightening my whip can do that...


Free turn!

Alright, we can kill Wyvern now.

Shocking...
Oh, dammit. Guess Thierry's not gonna be alive for the end now.

Okay, that's enough.



I draw the line at killing Dr. Hannighan.
Wait, what about the rest of us?
...I draw the line at killing my friends in general.



Wyvern Spear (+218 ATK, +40 HP, +40 TP; Highlander only) is made from 1 Restrained Legs (Wyvern conditional). Costs 220000 en.
Hello, best spear in the game! I'd be annoyed that Protectors can't equip it for some arbitrary reason, but whatever. I'll just get Vince an axe bonus on his Grimoire and stick a Meteor Axe on him come endgame time.

[Now, this... This is a good-ass spear.]
I grab it immediately for Afon.

I also got Corotrangul's conditional off-screen.
Arc Drawer (+191 ATK, +3 TEC, +5 VIT) is made from 1 Venom Spine (Corotrangul conditional). Costs 163000 en.
The VIT is mediocre, but the TEC's nice. I guess.

Ameno Habakiri (+255 ATK, +80 HP) is made from 1 Demon Core (Yggdrasil Core story mode drop). Costs 295000 en.
Also, I cheated in a Demon Core.
:getin:
This requires explaining. See, in Story mode, the party gets to fight what amounts to a cutscene boss version of the postgame superboss. You do have to try a little for a bit, but eventually it just devolves into smacking the thing with a bunch of damage coming from Dude until it dies. Then it drops the Demon Core, which makes the Ameno Habakiri. Because the Story party can totally use that without reclassing.

Why did I cheat it in? Because the actual real superboss fight doesn't drop it. It does have a drop, sure, but instead of the Demon Core, it's the True Demon Core, whose only purpose is selling for 1 million en. It does not unlock anything.

You can't get the Ameno Habakiri, the best katana in the game, without playing Story mode first, which consists of a party that cannot use it without reclassing.

Story mode was not thought through very well.

Anyway, I cheated it in because I cheated in the Monstrous Codex entries and Item Compendium entries for the rest of the Gladsheim stuff. Fuck EOU's stupid decision to make Story mode-exclusive stuff mandatory for 100%, I'm just gonna cut out the middleman of having to NG+ by editing my save.

Anyway, the Ameno Habakiri itself is good. Really, really good. It has the highest ATK of any weapon in the game, and gives +80 HP. I grab it for Momoe.

If you're wondering why I'm doing that, it's because I'm not going to give the postgame one goddamn inch. I'm taking every advantage I can get. When I've said that the EOU postgame is the meanest of the entire series, I mean it.

And if you're wondering why I'm not just waiting for the second best katana, it's because it sucks. 13 less ATK than the Ameno Habakiri, which is fair, but its extra attribute is adding an ice element to normal attacks. The third best katana can't be gotten until near the end of the 6th Stratum, and has 34 less ATK than the Ameno Habakiri, and gives 20 TP.

Basically, it's entirely possible to finish Story mode, use New Game +, and then buy this for your Ronin once you finish the main story in Classic. You could reasonably do this in an actual playthrough, which is why I have no qualms doing it here.

Anyway, that's it for now. Next time: we delve into the 6th Stratum. Strap yourselves in, because things get hard from here on out.
wait no get out
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[Hey, Elly?]
[Mm?]
Rrrrr...
[You've been...staring out the balcony for a while. Something up?]
[...Yeah. I'm worried.]
[About the deeper Stratum?]
[Exactly. Shinjuku was something I couldn't have even imagined when we started. What if the Stratum below it is...different, in a awful way? What if we can't get through it because we just...don't understand it? What if it's beyond what humans were meant to comprehend?]
[Got the shakes about the unknown, huh?]
[...I guess.]
[Well, nuts to that, I say. We've gotten through plenty of stupid bullshit we couldn't have imagined of when we started exploring. If we got through all that, we can get through whatever's below that dumb tree.]
[...You have...such a way with words, Afon.]
[In a good way, I hope.]
[Yeah.]
...
...
...
...
Hah-hah-hah.
[Aw, look, Rick's happy again.]
[I think he's hungry, too.]
[Wanna go hunt some deer? Still plenty of light out.]
[That sounds fun.]
Rrrrruff! Arf!

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