Final Update: ...To the Planet That's as Cool and Blue as Me! (Nameless vs. Star Devourer)

Didja finish Kindred Spirits last night?
Oh, yeah, after you went to sleep.
Didja cryyyyyy?~
Of-- Of course not! Why would I?! That's not a sad--
Raven, c'mon, I heard you crying!
...O-oh. Right. You're...not really a light sleeper, huh.
F-fine. I cried. B-but I bet you did too, when you finished it! I mean, think about it, they spent decades with each other as spirits, but only got one night together physically! How's that fair?! They couldn't actually hold each other, or play with each others' hair, or...k-kiss... Or... Uh, u-um...
I-I get where you're going with that! ...Isn't the important part that they got to be with each other for a long time, though? It Oh, right, forty years or so?
I mean, I guess, but... It's...not fair, really.
...Yeah. It isn't. ...At least it lets you appreciate being here more, right?
...That's a good way of looking at it.
...Do you think Sachi and Megumi reincarnated?
If they only got to really be together for a night... Do you think they were reincarnated after they passed on, destined to find each other again in their new lives?
Children. It's time.
We've got a cosmic horror to put to rest~
After that, we're allll done!
...Let's go, Raven.
And so, we reach the final update.

Everyone, like I mentioned last time, is level 99 plus retired at level 99. They also have their ultimate body armors equipped.

Jana, Kaelin, Lanzon, and Mio all have Orb Gauntlets and Grease Boots for their non-body armor equipment. The Orb Gauntlets give +25 HP as a bonus, and the Grease Boots give +4 to all stats. +4 isn't much with EO5 stats, but every little bit helps.

Raven is the odd one out, as he has the Yggdrasil Ring instead of Orb Gauntlets, to buff up both his physical damage, and make his magic damage a bit more acceptable, since he does have the Cradle equipped, and that does give him Explosion access.

The only other major equipment note I should make is Lanzon, as his maxed-out Brahmagiri gives him Banefire Breath access. Combined with Sacrifice, this is going to be...good.

Raven's final build:
Chaos Reap is 100% useless. Other than that, Raven has all of the different ailment attacks mostly just for variety's sake in getting the bonus damage from Frigid Reap. He's also going to get three Black Blade and Black Shroud stacks hilariously quickly.

Jana's final build:
In the end, Petal Scatter is what will matter the most here. After an entire game of just being "meh."

Kaelin's final build:
Kaelin's sole job is to spam Explode basically all fight.

Lanzon's final build:
The only skills that matter here are Sacrifice and the summoning passives. I guess I do use Wraith Cry once.

Mio's final build:
Passive healing's fairly important for keeping my party going, and Ruinous Prayer and Vitality Prayer will be all Mio needs in terms of buffs.

You just couldn't let us be without one more big fight, could you?
What's one more fight when we have an eternity left as ghosts?
Aha, see, C, that's where you're wrong~
Listen, you three. You've been absolutely darling travelling companions, and...well, ethereal bombs. I feel, this one time, you deserve a reward after we're done.
Once we have defeated the Star Devourer... I will release you three. Not just from my control, but from your betwixt-death state.
Of course.
Let's hurry up and kill this idiot, then!

And so, it begins.
Everyone, thank you all.

Raven needs to set up Miasma Armor.

Jana sets up High Ground for herself and for Raven.

Everyone in the back row can benefit from Amplifier.

Might as well use Wraith Cry on the main body.

Kinda need Aegis Shield to not get an instant game over on turn 1.

And some Ruinous Prayer for good measure.

Quick, Raven, give us a line about the power of love!
There's nothing as purposeless and pointless as a middle schooler's love!
I mean, we're in space, I guess?
Ah, yes, join the crowd.

If Star Devourer's going to cast Full Burst, all of the parts will skip their turn.

'Kay then, Raven, here's how you stand on your scythe.
Why would I...ever need to know that?

TICKLE TICKLE TICKLE this does nothing, does it.

At least I'm right back to it.

Various power noises.

The...power I suppose...
(Full Burst.)

I have Raven start with Paralyzing Reap.

Foot Sweep is Jana's best attack right now I guess.

Thunderbolt is an attractive damage option for Kaelin, if there's just one target.

Sacrifice for Banefire Breath on the next turn.

And I might as well have Mio get in on the Thunderbolt fun.


For low-modifier skills, these aren't bad numbers, honestly.

Whee-ha-ha! I am The Dark Goddess of Thunder!
Around 4500 damage. Not bad for a support character.

Hmph! I will not be outdone!
Common Magic's having a pretty nice effect here.

Ohhhhh that's gross...
(Regenerate: Agile Sword.)

(Regenerate: Rocket Engine.)
We already got Star Devourer below 90% HP, so it summoned a random part out of turn.

Time to break out Petal Scatter.

Kaelin switches to Explode.

Time to burn.

Mio lays down Vitality Prayer now.

(Sonic Thrust.)
...into Tails's gaping-
Yeah, that's always going to go before we do.

H... Halt!
Raven paralyzed the main Star Devourer body, which is pretty nice.

(Explosive Shot.)

(Petal Scatter.)
That is some nice damage for multi-target physical damage.

Fire coming out of my coffins is...disconcerting...
(Banefire Breath.)
Holy shit.

For damage that requires no setup, that is nice.

(Regenerate: Sound Cannon and Bomb Chamber.)
Hmph. Don't like the Sound Cannon coming out.

Raven needs to keep Miasma Armor going for the Black Blade and Black Shroud stacks.

Mio tosses out a Soma Prime to get everyone's HP up after using Vitality Prayer.

(Sonic Mirage.)
Well, that's annoying, but not too annoying. Just +20% evasion.

(Eerie Siren.)
Yeah that's gonna happen.

Jana's not only cutting down the parts' HP pretty quickly, but dealing respectable damage to Star Devourer at the same time.

And down goes the Rocket Engine.

For now, at least.

Ah, that's better.

ahahaha fucking A paralyzed the goddamn Sound Cannon

Aw, come on.

Raven breaks out Frigid Reap for now, since both Star Devourer and the Sound Cannon have ailments.

If Mio has nothing else to do, I might as well have her use Thunderbolt.

Okay, that damage to the main body is niiiiiiiice. That's almost 7% of Star Devourer's HP in one hit.

Much less concerning with buffed up max HP.

pfffffffft ahahaha Mio stunned the Bomb Chamber

And then Jana takes out the Bomb Chamber.

jesus, lanzon

(Regenerate: Energy Tube and Bomb Chamber.)
We're really chewing through Star Devourer's HP quickly if it's constantly doing out-of-turn Regenerates.


Mio refreshes Ruinous Prayer's duration.

Raven paralyzed the Energy Tube, so another Black Blade stack for him.

Get out of here, Rocket Engine.

(Heat Field.)
Oh well, the paralysis on Star Devourer was gonna wear off soon anyway.

Piss. I hate the Agile Sword.

I had Raven use Explosion because...

Y'know, I don't remember why I used it over Toxic Reap.

Pretty decent damage for an Earthlain using an INT-based attack.

Two for one! Away with the Energy Tube and Bomb Chamber.


Away with you~

(Regenerate: Sound Cannon and Towering Sword.)
If I have to have two parts be regenerated, I'm gonna go with Sound Cannon and Towering Sword. Those are pretty easy to deal with.

Jesus christ I'm only 8 turns in and Star Devourer's at 40% HP or so.

(Storm Edge.)
Stunning Jana is annoying, but at least none of the back row parts are alive.

The Sound Cannon is so hilariously ineffectual.

Stunned party members can still proc passive healing, by the way.

please stop bringing the bomb chamber back

Toxic Reap time.

Raven poisoned the main Star Devourer body and, more importantly, got his last Black Blade/Black Shroud stack.

(Blade Break.)

(Relief Echo.)
Again, to be expected.

The parts don't get to live for very long with this party, do they?

A reminder that Kaelin is still doing his thing.

Boo. I wanted my Frigid Reap damage.

Again with constantly triggering out of turn Regenerates.

Trust me when I say this is an absolutely abnormal pace for Star Devourer.

Of all the people that could've gotten tagged by the Sound Cannon... Raven?!

(Stiffener Injection.)

At least Banefire Breath purged it from the things in the front row.

And the one part that didn't get its buff purged died anyway.

Holy shit, just one Regenerate at the end of a turn?

Well, we're, uh, close to finishing.

*paff* goes the Energy Tube.

Ugh. That's a bit unlucky.

(Clear Noise.)
And there went my buffs. Dammit.

And the Bomb Chamber regenerated, just to really annoy me.


Away, Sound Cannon.


At least the Towering Sword's gone.

Not you too.


This attempt was going so amazingly well that I had Kaelin blow everyone's Union on Chain Blast, to keep the parts under control.

Head bind on the Star Devourer itself...

Head bind on the Energy Tube...

And leg binds on both the Bomb Chamber and Rocket Engine. Literally everything I could've asked for.

I'm safe.

Poison on Star Devourer, for extra Frigid Reap fun.

God I love these two.

We're just about done here.

I'm gonna miss you, Raven.

(Defeated Star Devourer!)

And so, I have purified the sacred ground of my beloved.
Oh my godddddddddd, Kaelin, you're so cute!
Can I please tell Magda you said that? Please?!
It's over.

The Result music continues into here.
After what feels like hours spent dodging the Star Devourer's relentless attacks and striking at its openings, the monstrosity finally wavers. The Star Devourer collapses to the ground. After quivering for a few intense moments, it finally stops moving and at last falls silent. You did it! You destroyed the eater of worlds! Your party erupts in uproarious cheers as you embrace and congratulate one another for this epic feat of bravery.
What, you're not interrupting them?
I'm better than that now.
...I am a man of my word, you three. Allow me a short bit.
...This feels...warm...
After...thousands of years...
Is this what...tiredness...felt like?
You three are free to pass on. Before you go, though.
Thank you. And... Rest in peace~
You always were...
A massive dork...
But, thank you...
...Never thought I'd be sad to see them go.
They'd been ghosts for longer than some civilzations came to be, and eventually fell. I think they deserved eternal rest by this point.
Archon, who had been watching the battle, steps forward and gives a flourishing bow.

Incredible. Guild Nameless truly is the stuff of legends. To be honest, I doubted any of us would live to see this moment. Yet here we are, in front of the fallen Star Devourer, standing victorious.
I believe I-- Erm, we, deserved more credit than that.
When I first came to Earth, I never dreamed humanity could grow so mighty as to put the Archon to shame... My imagination was lacking.
There's a cheerfulness, and a sense of relief, on the alien's face you've never seen before. You realize that Archon doesn't just see you as equals now, but honestly looks up to you. She is proud to have seen you come so far.
There is more that I must convey to you... Thank you for defeating the Star Devourer--from the bottom of my heart, as humans say. My people will be able to meet our ancestors in the stars with pride.
Archon mutters this, as she turns her gaze to the heaven with misty eyes.

A moment later, she returns her gaze to you before walking further into the chamber.

This is the exit, Guild Nameless. The space that connects your world to the one that I must now protect. I'd be lying if I said that I'm not sad to leave this planet after all these years... But my duty there is finally finished. In that regard, moving on instills me with an overflowing sense of serenity. That is why I have decided not to stop here, but to keep going. To wherever I am needed.
Turning her gaze back toward you, Archon offers her hand with a smile.
Well then, Guild Nameless. Let's go to the next planet, our new home, together...
Hello there.
...Alexis, Cecil, Gram, Dosen, and Magda? When did you five arrive?
A bit ago. Figured you'd be done killing the Star Devourer by now.
I'm glad our guess was correct.
I kinda wonder what that thing looked like...
Th... Thank you for not dying...
...Wh... Were you actually worried?
No, but... Well, as any disciple of Dinogator knows, everything can go wrong.
...With that out of the way, then... Are we all prepared to leave?

It is your choice whether to take Archon's hand and journey to a new world, or to return to Arcadia after seeing her off... After all, you're mythical adventurers now. You are free to choose your own destinies.
...You're...leaving? The six of you?
Indeed. I wish to see what lies beyond our home, and to help bring life to it.
I've accomplished all I wished to here. Now, I must bring the wonders of monster orchestra--and music in general--to new worlds.
Truth be told, I would rather see what arcane secrets a new world holds, instead of resting on my laurels and becoming an academic.
The same for me. Where there is a new world, there are new compounds for me to mix, and new life to imprint my knowledge on.
These old bones don't have much left in 'em after all this, haha. Might as well see something new, for Adrian's sake. Can't forget Falz and Greg, too.
...I just kinda want to know what's beyond the stars.
You've all said your goodbyes to Sasha and Iseria, I take it? Wouldn't want to leave them without a proper farewell.
Of course.
Well, um... Goodbye, then.
It was...more than fun, really, exploring with you all.
The same to you, Raven.
When I die and ascend to godhood, I'll make sure to look after you two! Gyahaha.
...Okay, yeah, I did have that letter sent back to Mom. She'll want to know where I went!
...Hahaha, ahahaha, ahahahahahaha, Doseeeeeeeeeeeen! Oh man, I'm gonna miss you, little dude.
...I believe Archon is beckoning us. It's time to go.
Mhm. Farewell, everyone! It was the joy of a lifetime getting to adventure with you.
I will keep you all in my memories until the end of time. Farewell.

...And away they go.
Welp. That's that, I guess.
Let's go back to town, then.
...Remus is gonna want to see our last Codex and Compendium entries, won't he?
Oh, yeah, that's right!
The credits roll here, but let's come back to them later, for narrative purposes.

After reporting in both the final Monstrous Codex and Item Compendium entries...

Magnificent! You've successfully scaled Yggdrasil and discovered all of the labyrinth's secrets. I can only imagine the hardships you endured to accomplish such an impressive feat. As a reward for all your hard work, I present to you the Crown of Arcadia. The Council of Arcadia officials recognize your heroism with this symbol. Take it with you as you journey to new lands. I'm sure rumors of your exploits will find their way back to this city, no matter where you go. Oh, but there's no need for you to rush off right away, though. Please, take a load off. Enjoy yourselves for the night. I'll personally prepare meals for you! Haha, no need to be modest. It is merely a token of my gratitude and a means for me to celebrate our friendship.
...I mean, heck, I'm down for some Remus Cooking!
I can't say I've ever had a meal prepared by a head of state... Or ever will again, ahaha!
Ohhhh my gods an entire meal prepared by Remus yes please.
Could do with a good meal after all that space nonsense!
I couldn't possibly think of a better way to conclude the adventure. ...Perhaps I should've kept those six here for one more night so they could've enjoyed this...

From here, the 100% complete credits roll--which are just the credits again, but this time the top screen's playing an animation of early class design sketches. Kinda neat, but not really worth fully documenting.

...Bit of Engrish there, what with referring to a proper noun with a definite article.

And our final, 100% complete save has a small medal on it. That's kinda cute.

I will conclude with the post-Star Devourer credits, the thing I skipped over earlier.

Give the music a listen. It's nice.
Um, Mio?
What's...going on with the 3DS? I was playing the Superstar Saga remake, and it just...suddenly went to black. And now there's just this... "New Game" button on the touch screen.
I didn't touch it yet, but-- Uwaaaah!

Raven?! Mio?!
...They're gone.
All of Mio's stuff, too. The computer, the games. It's just...gone.
...I think I'm gonna try and bottle the feeling I'm feeling right now and market it. "Blinking Game," by Sasha.

...Well. I suppose this is it.
Yep. Been swell exploring and fighting weird monsters with you guys.
I can't believe what I thought would be a one or two-off job led to... Just, everything.
Life certainly goes in odd directions sometimes, doesn't it? Hohoho~
...Our boat to Queensland is here, Sasha.
Alright. Goodbye, Lanzon! Goodbye, Jana! Take care of yourselves!
Enjoy yourselves, dears! Godspeed!
I'm expecting the best kingdom ever outta you two!

...I suppose I should be off to Sidonia, then. I'm a new man, and I think my legendary exploits should make for a nice new "in" to the modelling world~
I've got the utmost confidence in you, Lanzon, buddy.
And I've the utmost confidence you'll shock the performance world with your techniques, Jana.
Heh. That makes two of us!
Goodbye, then!
See ya, Lanzoni!
Later, y'all. Let's blow this dump. Seriously though, I question the choice to call the planet the characters are from "Earth" in the translation. It seemed pretty clear to me that it wasn't Earth. Oh well, whatever, not like anyone cares about the plot.


Written and Recorded by Ragnar Homsar
Translated by Clarste
Editing by alcharagia

Alexis went on to become the fastest overseer of any planet in all of history, and eventually, legends say he entirely became the wind; a fitting state for a man who loved to feel the breeze between his knees. Nine-Inch Coffins is now Earth's planetary band.

Cecil's monster orchestra played into the vastness of space as he flew off with Archon, and even tore through time; its eclectic, electronic sound visited Earth's far future, inspiring a mysterious Japanese man recorded only as Y-K to take up FM synthesizers.

Lanzon continued doing what he did best; being incredibly ripped and attractive in basically every single way. The appeal of having punched a star-devouring abomination out helped. Steaks in the shape of his face are on sale at your nearest Ceric and Sons Merchantry.

Having now witnessed the utterly inscrutable, Jana became more Amazing than ever, her performances and magic shows becoming ever more elaborate and spectacular than possible. She never became financially insolvent, either. How? Well, a magician never reveals her secrets.

Being together with her soulmate on a new frontier unexplored by Lunariankind was naturally an exciting prospect, but Magda never lost sight of her roots. Primordial Earth soon became home to a very cheery species of purple reptiles with incredible motherhood instincts. Incidentally, she is now prayed to for preventing disasters.

Wielding the vast powers of creation at his fingertips is one thing, but Kaelin was more remembered for his status as a devoted father and husband. All modern-day Alchemists, Zodiacs, and Runemasters derive in some way from teachings of the ancient lord-magus, known in the annals of history as "Smugbert."

Gram kept any number of promises and then some, still protecting Earth along with her faithful pets, Greg and Falz, even in the modern era, from supernatural evil. Her living descendants are most notable for their eternal war against Count Dracula. Gram never fails to inform Adrian of how apropos this is, every single day.

Queensland never had a better financial advisor than Sasha. Eventually, it in fact became so rich that it was said to be a land where you needed to work in order to pay. Beyond her wife, Iseria, she credits the family of an old Brownie friend as her greatest allies, especially his enterprising mother.

Returning home with head held high, Iseria brought unimaginable glory to her homeland, as well as a new royal family heirloom in her many weapons. The Assault Wand is now classified as an "Anti-World" weapon. She never lost her passion for observing wildlife, but managed to reign herself in from running off in the night upon taking the throne... slightly.

Mama said knock you out, and knock 'em out Dosen did. The diminutive healer with a penchant for explosive war crime scythes became the patron deity of Boss Characters almost immediately after landing down on Earth, and to this day, it's expected that any character voted in for four or more boss fights consecutively has his blessing. A certain Lagaardian Troubadour claims to have been named after Dosen's favorite band.

Remus eventually got put in charge of more than just telling people what the Council says to do, but nevertheless, he retained a reputaiton for being adorably baby-faced. He placed #1 on "Politicians You'd Want Your Child To Marry" ten years in a row. His most nightmarish experience was overseeing the marriage between Thaddeus and Mia, as it took eight days for Mia to stop screaming.

A man of simple pleasures and simple tastes, Edgar remained a well-respected Guildmaster for quite some time to come. An embarrassing incident involving one of Genetta's chickens led to him obtaining the nickname "Eggar," but he lopped off a G and now calls himself 'Egar' in order to retain some dignity.

Genetta's inn achieved financial success after Guild Nameless's expedition to the point where her older sister was actually able to pay off her cripplingly massive tab at the bar. To celebrate, Genetta brought every cat in town to the inn to party. Horde Of Cats Day is now a federal holiday in Aeolis.

Ceric eventually went home and told his family about all those things that made him think, wow, he hadn't seen that before. Ceric and Sons Merchantry remained relatively successful, but its unwillingness to commit to rollbacks on prices gave it competition in the form of a new invention known as a "Coupon."

Melina still exists, unchanging, spouting the same canned lines behind that same bar counter. Melina is eternal. Melina is inscrutable. The end is never the end is never the end.

Lily eventually finished her woodcarving of herself in miniature and presented it to Soleil. A national first was marked when Soleil burst into tears. Maybe next, some day, they'll put on some shirts.

As for these two...

...Oh. I... I guess it...really was...a-all a...dream... A...really long dream.

Alexis... Iseria... Sasha... Cecil... Kaelin... Lanzon... Gram... Jana... Dosen... Magda...


...Ha. Haha. I should've known it was all a dream. That kinda stuff only ever happens in games... Nothing fun ever happens in the real world...

...Nothing good ever happens to me...

...Mom and Dad are gone already. Guess I should get ready for school.

My name's Mio Akaneno. I'm a second-year student at Hibikino High School. Honestly, I'm still kind of in awe that I'm able to go here. I...don't have the best grades, or a lot of friends, or... Really, much of anything besides intimate knowledge of a lot of games! I think my parents just pulled a lot of strings to get and keep me here... So I kinda just pull myself to school every-- WAIT A MINUTE.

...So, this is the tree I've heard so much about. ...I wonder if I can convince it to bring her back to me. Even for just a day...
...M... Mio?
Oh... Oh my god, you're... It wasn't... I actually...
M-Mio, what...are you...
I... I woke up, and it'd only been... Been a day since I got sucked into the 3DS, and... I thought everything... Nameless, everyone... You... I thought it was just a dream!
...Ahahahaha! Nope, I'm right here! I... All I remember was accidentally hitting that New Game button, us screaming, and then... I was...awake in a different bed. I had memories of living an entire life here in...Japan, was it?
But I didn't actually remember any of it, if that makes sense. Even so, though, up, took a shower, ate some breakfast, and then I somehow remembered that today was my first day of high school! ...Even though I don't remember ever going to school before.
...Aha. Ahaha. Ahahahaha! Oh my god, it's a reverse isekai! What happened to me and put me in Arcadia put you in Japan now! ...Kinda. I mean, I wasn't reincarnated, but--
I...get the point. Also, um, if you'd...hadn't noticed... I'm, um...
...Oh, yeah, you're a girl now.
I don't think the reincarnation was 100% exact... It got my face and most of my body right, though! ...You, um, still love me, right?
Uh, a-duh. Why wouldn't I? You're still you! Ohhhhh my god, I've got so much I need to show you but the bell's ringing and oh crap we'd better not be late for the first day of classes! C'mon, Raven!

One final time for the EO5 LP:

Thank you very much for reading, and good night.
Now redo the whole thing with the localization's text or it's a shit-tier 0/10 LP.

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