Wow. I, uh, can't say I've ever seen someone make a usable hammock out of that little rope, much less that quickly.
Always be ready to give yourself a place to sleep on a moment's notice.
Okay, okay, I can do this, I can make a hammock too! That's not how you should wrap-- Wawawawawagh! That...was quite the WHUMP. Are you okay, Momoe? Yeah, I'm--ow--fine. Just...kinda stuck.
Is everything okay-- Oh. Me and my stupid luck... I mean, I'm not really lucky, either, but that was... Anyway, I left my knife over there... ...Sigrid? Why are you blushing?
Only a rock can break a rock.How Tenebris is like a rock is left to your imagination.
I'm going to be compressing a lot of stuff here, so pay attention.This is where you go to access the Golem area.
The monsters are, frankly, pathetic.
There's not much to the B5F portion of this.
Then there's the B4F portion. Those two FOEs are Reaping Shades.
If there's a "real" solution to getting past the Reaping Shades, I'm unaware of it.
...
... ...
...Maybe we shouldn't be this tense when exploring? It's going to get us ambushed at some point. Can't trust him. Gotta keep an eye on him at all times. I...assure you all...I'm...fine. Great, just like we practiced! My face hurts.
B3F has a bunch of Boulder Boars.
...What, that's it? Sure seems like it. The ground feels uneven... ...Oh, yes, this is the location of-- Don't. I assure you two, I wasn't going to-- Don't. You'll forgive me for skipping a very non-dynamic section.
...Was that room the location of the treasure? To my recollection... No! It's instead the burial site of a monster. Plausible. The floor was uneven all over. ...Maybe the monster has the treasure inside it? Worth a shot! The bandit's treasure:
Have you heard of Edue, the King of Thieves? I was told stories of him back when I was a kid. He was incredibly strong, and he and his band of thieves destroyed several towns as they traveled the world. I bring this up because the client claims to have been part of this band of thieves. Apparently, Edue himself gave this guy a treasure map, and it leads to something behind the crystal door on B5F. This is the location of that door.
It sounds a bit fishy to me... But a job's a job. Good luck, and keep an eye open out there. We don't actually have to go there now that we have the area already mapped out.
Everyone ready? Yes! Ah, good, he's back to normal. ...Good? I'm kinda used to the shouting now, honestly. He sounds weird when he's not doing it.
You think back on the quest you had accepted to search for the lost treasure of Edue, King of Thieves. According to the map, the treasure should be in this room... But you cannot make a thorough search of the room with the stone giant present. You can either take on the master of this room, or you can turn back now. ...Wow, I can't believe Quixote didn't cause this. Thank you!
Bring it on, Cliff-Face! blehhhhhhhh scatter about blehhhhhhhhhh
Golem
| HP: 6000 | STR: 52 | TEC: 34 | VIT: 33 | AGI: 30 | LUC: 28 |
Damage Vulnerabilities:
 50% |  50% |  50% |
 100% |  100% |  100% |
Disable Vulnerabilities:
 50% |  75% |  30% |  30% |  50% |  75% |  50% |
 0.1% |  0.1% |  20% | ||||
 75% |  30% |  75% |
- Flash: Attempts to inflict blind on all party members, with a high chance. Fast.
- Rock Hammer: Deals overkill bash damage to one party member. Deals splash damage to adjacent targets. Slow.
- Triple Hammer: Deals 3 instances of severe bash damage to random party members. Slow.
- Regen: Restores Golem's HP for a small amount at the end of every turn for 4 turns. Average speed.
- Power Wall: Increases Golem's physical defense by 70% for 4 turns. Fast.
- Force Wall: Increases Golem's elemental defense by 70% for 4 turns. Fast.
Endure: Used when Golem first reaches 0 HP. Prevents Golem from dying and restores 3000 HP.
- Flash: Attempts to inflict blind on all party members, with a 45% base chance. The effective chance ranges from 50% to 63% on average. Has a 120% speed modifier.
- Rock Hammer: Deals 140% melee STR-based bash damage to one party member. The damage ranges from 369 to 434 on average. Deals splash damage to adjacent targets. Has a 70% speed modifier and a base accuracy of 99%.
- Triple Hammer: Deals 3 instances of 100% melee STR-based bash damage to random party members. Has no limit on how many times one target can be hit. The damage ranges from 263 to 310 on average. Has a 70% speed modifier and a base accuracy of 99%.
- Regen: Restores Golem's HP, with 200% healing power, at the end of every turn, for 4 turns. Has no speed modifier.
- Power Wall: Increases Golem's physical defense by 70% for 4 turns. Has a 120% speed modifier.
- Force Wall: Increases Golem's elemental defense by 70% for 4 turns. Has a 120% speed modifier.
- Endure: Used when Golem first reaches 0 HP. Prevents Golem from dying and restores 3000 HP.
- From 100% to 51% HP, Golem will use either Rock Hammer, or normal Attacks.
- From 50% HP to death, Golem will use either Triple Hammer or Rock Hammer.
- Golem starts using Triple Hammer, and stops using normal Attacks, when its HP is at 50% or lower.
- Flash starts being used when Golem is at 75% HP or lower. After use, Golem will not use it again, until it randomly decides that it can.
- Power Wall is used when Golem first hits 65% HP.
- Force Wall is used when Golem first hits 35% HP.
- Regen is used when Golem hits 25% HP after using Endure.
- If the Regen flag is not set, and Golem used Endure, and its HP is at 25% or lower, use Regen, and set the Regen flag.
- If the Force Wall flag is not set, and Golem's HP is at 35% or lower, use Force Wall, and set the Force Wall flag.
- If the Power Wall flag is not set, and Golem's HP is at 65% or lower, use Power Wall, and set the Power Wall flag.
- If the Flash flag is not set, and Golem's HP is at 75% or lower, 50% chance to use Flash, and set the Flash flag.
- 30% chance to unset the Flash flag.
- If Golem's HP is at 50% or lower:
- 54% chance to use Triple Hammer.
- Else, use Rock Hammer.
- If Golem's HP is at 100% to 51%:
- 64% chance to use Rock Hammer.
- Else, Attack.
- Rock Hammer: Deals medium bash damage to one enemy. Slow.
- Triple Hammer: Deals 3 instances of bash damage to random enemies. Slow and moderately inaccurate.
- Rock Hammer: Deals 150% melee STR-based bash damage to one enemy. Deals splash damage to adjacent targets. Has a 70% speed modifier and a base accuracy of 99% at all levels.
- Triple Hammer: Deals 3 instances of melee STR-based bash damage to random enemies. Has no limit on how many times one target can be hit. Has a 70% speed modifier and a base accuracy of 80% at all levels.
Drops:
- Normal:
Statue Plate. 100% chance. Sells for 2000 en. 
Adama Armor (+50 DEF, +10% cut/stab/bash resistance): Made from 1 Statue Plate. Costs 7400 en.- Conditional:
Statue Arm (Kill while arms are bound). 100% chance. Sells for 6000 en. 
Meteor Axe (+240 ATK, +50 HP, +5 VIT): Made from 1 Statue Arm. Costs 260000 en.
Golem likes to splat party members. Like, splat as in one-shot. And it's only marginally less bad if you have a Protector.I don't have a Protector, so this should be fun.
If you come here around this point, you're in for a pretty rough tussle. Golem is not complicted; it hits hard. Very hard. Bring your strongest mitigation and effective healing, because you'll need it. An Alchemist won't hurt either, even with Force Wall. Bring a Hexer if you're worried about the buffs.
These two will die if I don't have them using Defend until I can get a disable on Golem.
Katya is my literal only offense, so buffing her with a Bravant makes sense. Also, note how I'm not opening with Analysis. Golem isn't actually weak to elements in EOU, which is, y'know, great.
Suicide Word would be a nice way to compensate for my lack of elemental damage.
I take it you're not particularly enthused about being hit with those fists either. Big nope.
Catch.
Well, that...didn't work out... fuck you, you stupid rock
You will eventually be eroded by the inevitable passage of time! ...Too eventual? Shoulda mentioned what I'll do to it right--
Ow, ow, ow, my foot, owwww! Well, that's a bit lackluster.
OWWWWWWWWWWW! Ah, good, I can toss Nectars to revive people. You can, but did you ever think about if you should? Sorry.
For a rock, it's very nimble--!
Once you are afraid, you will hit yourself over and over, and it will be very painful! ...I can't believe it fell for that.
It's finally safe to use these.
I don't think I've mentioned this yet: my rule for tossing out Somas is when three or more people are hurt for at least half of what a Soma would heal for.
The people presently in the front are taking this turn to set up, so Quixote'll use Suicide Word.
NOW HIT YOURSELF!
Ready to become stone dead?! ... ...Look, all I'll say is I'm glad "pun-making" isn't one of the reasons Siggy loves me.
Much better.
Sure, I'll take that.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!
These two get to finally start attacking...
And these two amplify it.
Wooooooooooooo... ...Mournful? I-- I was...trying something different... Hee. Afon doesn't know how lucky she is. She-- She does, I assure-- I'm kidding, Elly, I've seen you two having fun. Ohhhhhh...
Maybe I can smooth you out to make a nice gift for Siggy--!
...I need to learn some new techniques.
Much better than earlier!
One-third of the way there. Remember, Golem's gonna get half its HP back once we deplete this bar.
A few turns later...
YESSSSS I DID--
Hey wait a minute bullshit you don't get to do that what the-- Please calm down.
Great.
Arm binds will keep me safe, at least.
Efficiency'd Amrita IIs are so high-value.
Aaaaagh! Who am I kicking?! Thhh's mh fsss.
Okay, phew, I'm safe for a bit.
...Spot my error...
Sweet, I can see again!
...I could see. I'm...aware...
Right, let's fix that...
Should give Katya a boost...
Yup.
Arm bind wore off, I'm close to victory, no mercy.
Ahaha, eat shit, you're gonna die.
Fuckin'--
See ya!
Woooooooo! Yeah! Yet again, the most reckless of us gets the rest of us out alive...
It shouldn't make sense, but it does... That went a lot better than the previous recordings, where Quixote would inflict fear, and it would wear off one turn later.
If so, the treasure could be hidden somewhere close by. Alright, people, let's dig.
... Was this story about Edue just that: a story...? You may not have found anything, but you should report that you have searched the area back at the pub. Godsdammit, we've been had.
His grandson was an adventurer...who lost his life in the Labyrinth. He'd heard from his grandson's guild that the boy was killed fighting a monster that lived in a certain place. With that in mind, he started thinking of how to avenge his grandson... The monster was too strong, and no one would accept a quest to simply kill it. That's why he made up a story about the King of Thieves to get adventurers to fight the monster. ...Oh. I thought it was strange. The stories of Edue are so old, surely nobody who had been with him would be alive today. Besides, there's no real proof that Edue actually existed in any case. Anyway, when the old man realized what he had done... He realized that his lie might cost others their lives, and that those people would have families, too. He came running back here, begging me to take down the job. Of course, by then it was too late. Still, you're back, and you defeated the monster. No way some dumb pile of stone's gonna kill me! Or me! I would've been able to run had things soured, at least. He'll be happy, and you get paid. It's happily ever after for everybody, isn't it? Except the monster...
I didn't spend the points, because I was about to be done recording anyway.
And to end tonight's proceedings... Adama Armor (+50 DEF, +10% cut/stab/bash resistance) is made from 1 Statue Plate (Golem normal). Costs 7400 en. Now this is some good shit for Protectors and Landsknechts. You'd be hard-pressed to find a better form of damage reduction than a flat 10% cut to all physical damage in EOU. This is honestly probably one of the strongest heavy torsos in the game because of how messed up armor is. The only reason I wouldn't suggest it for Landsknecht is because of a high-end armor that they get access to eventually. And with that said, we're done for now! Next time: sand.Next Update
Previous Update
Table of Contents
